I'm am fastly approaching my one year mark on being back in South Carolina. This milestone is only a few days away (August 5th) and I wanted to sort of reflect on how crazy this year has been. I never would have dreamed that I would be back in South Carolina and I surely would not have dreamed my life would have taken the turns it has. Last year at this time I was living out of my car and couch surfing in Athens, stressing over my last few days in a horrible cell biology class and crying myself to sleep every night (if I did sleep) because I DID NOT WANT TO LEAVE ATHENS! At this time last year I was going through a rough break up with my first boyfriend and long time best friend and dreading leaving everyone I loved behind to move to what I thought was a dead end town (no offense to my Lyman folks, but those were my feelings). I had no vision. No clue about where my life was taking me. I was just so heartbroken at what was happening. To put things simply I couldn't see the forest for the trees. What I thought was the worst decision of my life actually turned into the best blessings I have every received.
My first few months were rough, and since a lot of you reading this may not know the whole story, I'll be frank and honest. I moved back in with my parents until I found a place and instead of socializing I chose to sleep, watch TV, and cry, hoping that somehow my life would take this magical turn back to Athens and I would be perfect again. That is not what happened. Although my life did take a turn. It was upon returning to Athens for a football game and having a rough run in with my ex and seeing how different things were with my friends that I woke up from this slumber. It was as if I was slapped in the face. I think that experience is actually my last post on here.
Well the next week I ran into an old friend from high school. Well we will call him more of an acquaintance because we only spoke once or twice throughout our whole schooling together. Nonetheless, the chap showed me how to laugh again. He reminded me of who I was. (Somehow I had forgotten this). And showed me how to gain my voice again. I am forever grateful to him for this. We had our ups and downs along the way that you have with any friend. We had trouble defining our relationship at times but regardless we never had a dull one. We laughed until we cried on many occasions and made people wish they were as cool as us. There's no denying that this friendship was important to my survival and new love of Lyman. I believe that God brings people into your life at the right time when you need them most and God knew this was someone who needed to be there. Regardless of what happens with him, I know and will always know that this past year with him was there to strengthen me with the good the bad and the ugly. And I will always love him for that. Whether I'm telling a joke about Bruce Lee or drinking a blue mountain dew, I know adventures with him are what saved me.
Along with him came a loving cousin. I wouldn't trade this guy for the world. He listened to me cry over and over about craziness in my life. He would just sit and chill and we would talk about the shenanigans of the day. But more importantly he taught me that everyone is going through stuff. He had his own heartbreaks he was dealing with and we could talk and share our feelings together and give each other feedback. He has forgiven me when I have hurt him horribly and he has always been there when I have called him. I don't know where I would be without J.Man but I never in a million years would have thought we would be as close as we have become. He is my buddy fo life! And he brings something special to the table in our relationship. An heir of understanding. I am forever grateful for him as well.
One of the things I did most when I moved back was watch movies. I watched hundreds of movies by myself when I first moved back. Yea that's kind of depressing. But there was a blessing in that. An old friend (one of my first best friends) was the manager. After seeing me so many times it sparked an old flame that had kind of faded. She had never left my mind when I left for college but we had lost touch. Today I am more grateful for this reuniting than anything. This girl has been there for me through EVERYTHING in the past year. From crying over hurt feelings to wrestling with inner demons to which shoes go with my dress. This girl is my soul mate and I have no clue where I would be without her. I love her unconditionally and trust her with my life. I'd take a bullet for that girl in a heart beat and will always stick up for her.
Someone I had stayed in contact with, my best friend forever was glad I was home. In fact the day I moved home I kidnapped her for a surprise birthday party for herself. It was bittersweet for me that day. I was happy for her but I wanted to cry more for Athens (I had been crying all the way home). Looking back I think of how selfish I was being and I want to publicly apologize to her. I am sure on so many occasions I offended her by putting down Lyman and being back but she never once complained or thought twice about it. She listened. She encouraged and she uplifted. I am so thankful for her in my life. She has been the voice of reason in my life over the past year and has reeled me back in when I was getting to far from myself. She has stayed true and grounded in her spiritual life and has slapped me in the face spiritually when I was losing sight of God's plan. I thank God every day for that girl because without her over this past year I would have lost myself completely. I love her to the moon and back and would take a bullet for her as well. Thank you for always being there for me special friend and I am so excited for where God is taking you right now.
Of course the most important thing that happened this past year is moving in with my roommate. When I moved out of my parents I moved into a big house by myself. This was dangerous because at the time I was still so depressed and now I'm also lonely all the time. I have always been sort of a loner. I enjoy a lot of alone time and am quite content with just being me, but when you are depressed this is not always the best thing. I spent a majority of my time in my living room, laying on the floor crying and falling asleep to the same movie every night. My life from Athens was still in boxes and I had no intention of unpacking until someone made me. Well that someone was a God send. I had been throwing out that I wanted a roommate for months to a few special friends that I mentioned but it was this chick that took me up on my offer. I ran into her at the insurance office when I was paying a bill and we started talking about life ( I went to school with her as well and somewhere along the way we had lost touch). We both agree that we never expected to see each other again. We had always been friends but had not been close since elementary school. What was just paying bills on a regular basis turned into us working out together. One day when we were working out she said hey I can move in next week. I had to take a step back. I was a day fresh off the plane from Mexico and I wasn't sure I was ready to have someone move into my space of melancholy. But I knew it would be less money on bills and that trumped my need for solitude. That decision is the best I have made by far I would say. She has become one of my best friends and confidants. Our late night talks about boys and life have been so enjoyable and full of wisdom and to top it off we are twinnsies. We have so much in common and I have come to rely on her for so much in my insane life. I love her so much and look forward to our roommate times together.
Of course there are others who have made this Lyman life bearable and showed me how many blessings I have here, but these people, these people are the people that have made huuuge impacts in my life.Without moving back to Lyman I would have never gone to Mexico. This is another blessing. I have a family there as well and wound up living with them for a month. Eventually I hope to move there but that is not in the cards for now so small visits are best.
I have not forgotten my Athens family! I have visited Athens a lot over the past year and every chance I go or every chance I get I soak it up. Those Athens moments are now cherished and not taken for granted. They are sipped on and chewed gracefully much like a fine wine. I am grateful for every opportunity I get to go back there. But if I'm truly honest I wouldn't change where I am for the world. I still have no clue where my life is headed at this point but I know this. I am content. I am honestly and truly content. I am settled into the Lyman life for now. That could always change tomorrow. But today, this moment right now, this is where I am. I am Chelsea Patterson. I have my bad days and good days. I am still dealing with a broken heart but I am stronger for overcoming what I have. I am enrolled in a Masters program at NGU and I have the greatest people in the world around me.
